Chapter 205: Chapter 205: An Nan’s Years of Deep Guilt
"Many people think Jiayou is my child, and I’ve never explained otherwise. He is actually my brother’s orphan. My brother and sister-in-law both passed away in a car accident, leaving behind their three-year-old child. At the time, I was in Africa and hadn’t been in touch with the family for a while, so I didn’t know what had happened until I returned from Africa to the United States a month later. Hearing the news, I felt my mind go blank and my whole body tremble. It took me a long, long time to calm down. Once I was calm, the first thing I did was buy a ticket to return home. However, I was still late, and my brother and sister-in-law had already been buried. I didn’t get to see them one last time."
"The last time I saw Little Jia You was when he was born; I returned home once. Now he’s three years old, and yet everything has changed."
"When I saw him, he was sitting alone with his head down in the living room, mute and silent. Initially, I wanted to find someone to take care of him, but in that moment when he hugged me, I couldn’t let him go. After much consideration, I decided to take him with me. After all, he’s the one who calls me Aunt; he’s the only bloodline left by my brother. Then, I took Little Jia You to the United States. In the first year, he didn’t say a word. I took him to see numerous doctors, who all said there was nothing wrong. Finally, I took him to a psychologist, who diagnosed that he might have been traumatized by his parents’ passing. The doctor suggested I take him out to interact with people more often. After that, no matter where I went, I would bring him with me. I didn’t let him call me Aunt, but instead, Mom. He only occasionally called me Mom; typically, he’d call me An Nan, until he wanted to stay in the United States to study alone."
Listening to this, Lin Mubai felt a surge of tenderness and pain in his heart, along with growing questions. After some thought, he asked, "What about your uncle and aunt?"
In a typical family, with the brother and sister-in-law gone, shouldn’t there still be grandparents around?
An Nan smiled wryly and continued shaking her head. In her smile, Lin Mubai saw helplessness and sadness: "Dad passed away long ago; in fact, my brother’s mom and my mom weren’t the same person. My brother’s mom and Dad had a bad relationship and divorced. Later, Dad met Mom, his first love, and they formed a new family. But Mom was very good to my brother, and my brother was very good to me. Mom even became friends with my brother’s mom after remarriage."
At this point, Lin Mubai couldn’t listen any longer. He stood up from his chair and came to An Nan’s side, embracing her head into his arms: "It’s all past now, it’s all past."
Leaning in that warm embrace, a glistening tear quietly slipped from An Nan’s eye, eventually falling onto Lin Mubai’s shirt, leaving a faint mark on the white fabric.
She didn’t know what was wrong with her tonight. She had kept these words in her heart for many years, never spoken them to anyone. But today, in front of this man, she just wanted to pour them all out. Could it be because she had been lonely for too long?
"I’m fine; I just feel sorry for Jiayou. Over these years, I haven’t taken good care of him. I’ve always dragged him around with me, never educated him well, letting him do something like he did today."