Chapter 49: Li Ming’s family is too strong (and too weird)
After eating too many noodles, Li Ming fell asleep in his room.
He started to dream about his family.
And so, the legendary (and strange) Li family appeared.
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Father – Li Da
Li Ming’s father was huge. His arms were like tree trunks. His beard was so thick it scared little kids.
But... he was the worst farmer in the whole village.
He once tried to plow the field. The plow broke in one second.
He once tried to plant corn. He planted all the seeds upside down.
Little Li Ming asked, "Father, why are the roots pointing at the sky?"
Father Li Da puffed his chest. "This is secret farming! The roots will drink qi from the heavens!"
Three days later, all the crops died.
Mother nearly hit him with a broom.
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Mother – Madam Li
Li Ming’s mother was kind. She smiled every day. She loved to cook.
But... her food was deadly.
Her steamed buns were harder than stones.
One bun once broke a table.
Another bun once cracked the floor.
"Eat, Ming’er," she said. "It will make you strong."
Li Ming bit into one and almost cried.
"Mother... this is not food. This is a weapon."
She nodded proudly. "Exactly. You eat it to train. You throw it to fight. My cooking has two uses."
Later, the villagers used her buns to fix a broken wall.
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Sister – Li Mei
Li Ming’s little sister looked sweet. Cute face, tiny smile.
But she was scarier than both parents.
Why? She loved martial arts.
"Brother! Hold still!" she shouted.
Then BAM! she kicked him in the ribs.
"Brother! Hold still!"
Then WHACK! she punched him in the stomach.
One time, she tied him with a rope and used him as a training dummy.
Li Ming cried, "Mother! Father! Help!"
His mother shouted from the kitchen, "Good training!"
His father shouted from the field, "Survive, son!"
So every day, Li Ming lived in pain.
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Back to Now
Li Ming woke up in his bed, sweating.
He rubbed his face. "No wonder I turned out like this. My family is a nightmare."
Outside his window, disciples were gossiping.
"I heard Li Ming’s father is a farming genius."
"I heard his mother is the best cook in the land."
"I heard his little sister is a hidden prodigy."
Li Ming covered his head with a pillow.
"If only they knew the truth..."
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Bonus Bit
That night, Wu Jian sneaked into the library.
He found an old scroll: The Li Family Records.
He opened it, eager to learn Li Ming’s weakness.
He read about the farming.
He read about the buns.
He read about the little sister’s kicks.
Wu Jian dropped the scroll. His face turned pale.
"This... this is insane. His whole life was training in hell!"
Wu Jian clutched his head. "I can’t beat someone raised by monsters..."
Then he fainted in the library.
To be continued...