Chapter 1 What the Hell is Going On?!

Wei Yuan's body stiffened, his eyes slightly unfocused, staring straight ahead. The dazzling, boundless golden karma was so dense it nearly blinded him. In theory, karma was formless and without substance, only coalescing into pure gold when one had deep connections with the world, with all things under Heaven.

Generally, even a few strands of golden karma meant one had contributed to Heaven and Earth.

It denoted someone at the level of a true cultivator of humanity, or a mountain and water deity.

But what was before him now wasn't one or two strands, not even dozens or hundreds.

It was tens of millions!

Tens of millions!

They were densely packed, surging wildly, swelling right before his eyes. Their brilliant light frantically squeezed into his pupils, almost blinding him. Wei Yuan's Yuanshi physique was habitually activated at a low level, but it still represented the power of karma observation. In that instant, he was nearly blinded.

It was like waking up in the middle of the night and being directly hit by the high beams of a car.

Wei Yuan's smile froze.

The water ghost yawned, even that yawn tasting like iced cola.

Then he saw Wei Guanzhu over there, and thought of his unrestrained behavior during this period. In short, it could be summed up as: "The Guanzhu is away, let's party! Let's have fun! Let's get hyped!"

His expression instantly stiffened, and he hurried over, bowing and smiling obsequiously, "Oh my."

"I was wondering why the magpies outside were chirping so loudly today."

"Turns out, it's because you're back, Guanzhu. Ahahaha..."

"Want some cola?"

"I've been researching all sorts of flavors lately. There's ginseng cola, salted vegetable and tofu cola."

"And Sprite-flavored cola."

"Want a couple of glasses?"

Wei Yuan didn't respond to this long-overdue greeting, didn't, as usual, retort with, "Are you a museum employee or a madam from some shady establishment?"

Embarrassing!

Instead, he slightly raised his gaze, focusing it behind the water ghost, who was desperately trying to avoid being kicked out again. He saw countless karma intertwining and transforming, vast and chaotic, coalescing into a majestic nine-headed tiger. He saw the nine-headed tiger's eyes lowered, brilliant and magnificent, exuding a terrifying aura.

Brilliant golden light, the visage of a nine-headed divine tiger.

'...Kai Ming?'

Wei Yuan almost gnashed his teeth as he muttered those words.

Nine-headed Kai Ming, one of the three Kunlun Gods, capable of seeing through walls.

With thorough and penetrating vision, he could observe the ten directions, above and below, without obstruction.

Within and without the six directions, ghosts, gods, people, hidden and manifest, great and small, nothing escaped his clear and distinct perception.

The leader in the path of cognition!

The water ghost asked in confusion, "What? Open a bottle?"

"Okay! I'll go get one!"

The water ghost was overjoyed. Then, Wei Yuan saw the massive nine-headed Kai Ming, formed from countless karma and qi, lower its eyes. Those pure golden eyes swept over Wei Yuan, and then it extended a paw. The paw curled, and *smack*, it heavily struck the water ghost's stomach.

"Hiss!!"

The water ghost clutched his stomach, hissed, and said, "Why am I suddenly hungry?"

"So hungry, so hungry."

"My stomach hurts from hunger."

"Food first, food first!"

Wei Yuan's lips twitched.

Could it be... could it be that the water ghost's daily appetite and hunger came from this?

Physical hunger.

Then he saw the petite girl artist holding her drawing board, walking over in slippers with a *da-da-da*. The surrounding clouds coalesced into a goddess whose face couldn't be clearly seen. Her robes fluttered, her headdress was solemn, she stepped on auspicious clouds, with ribbons floating around her, and then slowly flew towards the dining table.

Wei Yuan blinked.

He saw the girl artist holding her drawing board, practically floating down.

In the aura of karma, this usually housebound girl artist was directly stepping on the cloud qi of that goddess, too lazy to move herself. Wei Yuan's mouth twitched: "...Moving like that?"

The girl artist saw Wei Yuan, yawned, and looked sleepy.

Then she reached out and rubbed her eyes. This action was very common, after all, Vodka-niangniang was an artist.

And also a ghost.

With both buffs stacked, she was the most nocturnal being in the entire museum.

She often stayed up until four or five in the morning before going to sleep. Sleeping at one or two was for her just the beginning of the day, the most brilliant time. So she often yawned sleepily, her fingers slightly curled, like cat paws rubbing her eyes.

But now, before Wei Yuan's eyes.

He saw the girl artist's curled hand grabbing the ribbon of the goddess, and then using the illusory, ethereal ribbon to wipe away the tears caused by sleepiness, before yawning and mumbling, "Good morning, Guanzhu, you're back..."

"Let's eat soon."

"..."

Wei Yuan watched the girl artist sit down, and then felt a huge shadow cast down, falling on his body and face, possessing a strong sense of oppression.

Wei Yuan stiffly turned his head and saw the old soldier's spirit, who nodded at him meticulously.

He saw behind him, a huge nine-tailed tiger walking with its head held high, dignified and solemn.

Unlike the previous goddess and Kai Ming, it didn't help the soldier spirit.

Instead, it maintained the soldier spirit's meticulous code of conduct.

Wei Yuan watched as the nine-tailed tiger and the soldier spirit walked past him with meticulousness and solemnity.

*Pa-thump!*

As if time had stopped, an illusory sound rang out, and then a book directly slipped from the nine-tailed tiger's true spirit and fell to the ground. Wei Yuan subconsciously looked down, and then his gaze froze: "《Confidential · NTR of Married Women》, 《The Best Works of Cao Cao》..."

The nine-tailed tiger's aura froze.

It met Yuanshi Tianzun's eyes.

Finally, Yuanshi Tianzun remained silent, slowly averting his gaze, pretending he didn't see anything. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw the nine-tailed divine tiger silently collecting all the books, then hiding them in the fur on the back of its neck, still striding forward, his expression solemn and heavy, sitting at the dinner table with meticulousness.

Nine-tailed tiger.

Nine-headed heavenly tiger.

And the solemn goddess whose face couldn't be seen.

Wei Yuan was silent, feeling only a chill run down his spine—

The nine-tailed tiger was Lu Wu.

The nine-headed tiger was Kai Ming.

Then who was that goddess? It couldn't be the Queen Mother of the West, right? No, the temperament didn't match at all. Even Lu Wu, but wasn't Lu Wu's main body still in Kunlun Mountain? He only provided support once during the Disaster of the South Sea and the battle with the Turbid World. That meant Lu Wu was still alive and well.

How could there be Lu Wu behind the soldier spirit?

Besides, Lu Wu wasn't like Kai Ming, who liked to play with clones for fun.

The authority didn't match...

The girl in home clothes took brisk steps, seeing that Wei Yuan seemed to be in a daze, couldn't help but laugh, reached behind her waist, and gently untied her apron. Her left hand pulled Wei Yuan's wrist, and then with a light step in her cotton slippers, *di-di-da-da*, she spun around, and gently threw the apron into Wei Yuan's arms:

"What are you still standing there for?"

The girl's face was slightly flushed, her appearance was beautiful and delicate, unaware of the strangeness in the room:

"Let's eat."

Wei Yuan came back to his senses, raised his head, and watched Jue walk towards the dining table with her hands behind her back, her steps light.

Outside the museum, when the neighbor aunt came back from buying groceries, she saw that the museum was full of people, unusually bustling. She greeted with a smile, "Has the Guanzhu finally returned from his business trip? Haha, it's rare to see it so lively, good, it's good to be lively, it's good to be lively."

Wei Yuan responded with a stiff smile.

He saw the reflection from the glass window.

At a large table, Liu Niu was eating white rice, while the water ghost was gulping down cola into his white rice, glaring at the girl artist. The girl artist rolled her eyes, and then gulped down vodka into her white rice. The soldier spirit was meticulously balancing the proportions of vegetables, meat, rice, and soup, while the last remaining paper figurine was struggling to hold onto the vinegar bottle.

Jue was smiling warmly, talking to Jingwei.

Wei Yuan was sitting next to them, it did look warm and beautiful...

Yes, warm and beautiful.

The Daoist closed his eyes, the golden lines of Yuanshi Tianzun reappearing in his eyes.

Then he saw here, the Celestial Court's Thunder Department, Jade Pivot Left Divine General's Dharmakaya entangled in thunder, standing behind Uncle Niu, a yellow turban appearing on his head; he saw the nine-headed tiger, he saw Lu Wu's true form, he saw the faceless goddess draped in feather robes and ribbons, all their bodies majestic and divine, emitting brilliant and vast light and power.

Wei Yuan stiffly lowered his head.

What the hell was going on?

Western Kunlun?

Was this place really a museum?

Or was it the Western Kunlun Divine System's human-based special operations division?

Wei Yuan's mind was filled with one question after another, one doubt after another. He looked at the meticulous Lu Wu, then looked at the faceless goddess behind the girl artist, exuding an aura of grace, and finally chose the nine-headed cat, Kai Ming, who was the most familiar and the one he had beaten up the most. He put down his chopsticks, patted the water ghost, and then pointed to the room inside.

The water ghost suddenly understood and nodded.

He snapped his fingers, conjuring up Fanta and Sprite clones.

He said with practiced ease, "Come on, kick me out!"

Uncle Niu: "??"

Wei Yuan: "..."

"No, I'm not asking you to kick yourself out, come here!"

Wei Yuan pulled the water ghost into the quiet room. The water ghost was puzzled, then shocked, and stepped back, hugging his arms together to protect himself, saying, "Hey, hey, Wei Guanzhu, although I was forced to read that midget's... stuff, I'm straight! If you really can't, you, you go find Bai Ze!"

"The number one beauty in the world, you know!"

"White-haired, red-eyed, decadent big sister, you know!"

Wei Yuan delivered a chop to the water ghost's forehead, complaining, "Don't be a clown at a time like this."

The water ghost was puzzled.

Wei Yuan sighed: "I already know your true form."

He couldn't help but complain:

"I didn't expect that Yuan Tiangang only said one sentence back then, and you actually drowned yourself and then fished yourself up..."

The water ghost was still puzzled, saying, "Haha, boss, what are you talking about? What true form?"

"Oh, you're such a joker, how could I be working anywhere else?"

Wei Yuan said, "Is that so? Want a candied haw?"

The water ghost replied, "Candied haw? No, I only drink cola."

Wei Yuan casually took out a candied haw from his sleeve, shook it, and then tossed it away. The candied haw spun as it fell, and just as it was about to hit the ground, a hand caught it. The huge golden nine-headed tiger behind the water ghost suddenly caved inward. The water ghost's eyes went blank, and then he casually stuffed the candied haw into his mouth.

"I didn't expect to be discovered."

The water ghost slowly opened his mouth. Although the voice's timbre hadn't changed, it had a more frivolous feel to it.

Then, he ran a hand through his hair. His eyebrows and facial features didn't change, but his temperament became more elegant, like a carefree celebrity. He gave a slight bow, a teasing smile on his face:

"So, what do you need your employee to do for you?"

"Respected Guanzhu?"

"Or should I call you this?"

"Yuanshi Tianzun."