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"...Back then, Mother didn't like me very much because I was a girl." Looking at the sky, Su Tan'er said softly after laughing, "She always hoped... to give Father a son in the future. Father thought so too, but at least Father was more affectionate towards me. He said I was smart, and if I had a younger brother in the future, he would definitely be even smarter. Father always looked at the image of his future brother in me, but Mother didn't even want to look at me. At that time, I always clung to Mother, but she ignored me. Sometimes, if I did something wrong that annoyed her, she wouldn't even hit me, just waved her hand and had the wet nurse take me away. Husband, the greatest contempt in this world is this kind, right... Later, I knew that Mother always wanted a younger brother. At first, I even hated my younger brother a little, not understanding what was different about girls..."

Wildflowers bloomed in patches on the hillside, and Su Tan'er placed her hand on her lower abdomen, watching the white clouds disperse in the evening. Ning Yi had originally closed his eyes and smiled, but at this moment, he opened them: "It's okay, they don't like us, and we don't like them either."

"Heh, I can dislike Mother, but Husband can't, or people will point fingers and call him an unfilial son-in-law."

Ning Yi turned his head and looked at her for a while, then said earnestly, "They can't out-scold me."

"Pfft..." Su Tan'er couldn't help but cover her mouth. After a moment, she looked at the sky and spoke again.

"I'm considered quite strange among girls. Later, I read some books and didn't think it was just the way things were, like those daughters of noble families. Instead, I felt that Father and Mother weren't good to me, that it wasn't fair at all. I grew up with the wet nurse in that large mansion, feeling on the one hand that I had to become a boy who would make Father and Mother regret it, to take over the family business. On the other hand, I felt that I was a girl, and I had to learn everything a girl should learn, otherwise wouldn't that prove that I actually envied those boys? Wouldn't that mean I lost?"

Ning Yi reached out and picked off a blade of grass stuck to her hair. Su Tan'er's voice was leisurely: "Growing up in that kind of family, the wet nurse was good to me when I was little, always saying that we were a wealthy family, that I was a daughter of a noble family, that everyone envied me. But when I became sensible, I felt that there was nothing to envy. Father didn't like me, and Mother didn't either. If it were a small family, I wouldn't have this kind of trouble. Actually, I also understand that if the family wasn't so big, if I had an older brother, Father and Mother wouldn't have such great pressure, and I wouldn't have been neglected. I... In the times when I didn't like Father and Mother, I later discovered that I had become the same kind of person as them. There was no human touch in that family..."

"I... Your concubine, is not a daughter of a noble family. I just learned from others, but I'm not really like one. Your concubine... likes poetry, but I'm not good at writing it myself, and I'm not very good at appreciating it. So I told myself that there were too many things to learn at that time, business matters and all, that there was no time at all... But that's not really the case. Your concubine doesn't really like poetry. I just like the feeling of being sought after... Sometimes when I think about these things, seeing Father and Mother's appearance, I think that I don't want to have children in the future. If I have children and don't raise them well, and she ends up like me, blaming me, her mother, what should I do..."

"The standards are too high, no one purely likes poetry... You'll be a good mother." Ning Yi interjected.

Su Tan'er shook her head and smiled: "When I was fourteen or fifteen years old, I didn't want to get married, so I kept dragging it out. Then, when I really couldn't drag it out any longer, I chose Husband."

She tilted her head, looking at Ning Yi lying next to her: "But I wasn't really sincere at that time. I let Xiao Chan take care of Husband and ran away on the wedding day, only returning several days later. Later, although we lived together, I didn't respect or care about Husband too much..."

"Isn't it already very good?"

Su Tan'er shook her head on the grass, her expression already becoming calm, only with a few natural smiles: "It's not very good, it was just... your concubine was pretending, pretending to be like a daughter of a noble family, pretending to be very understanding of the big picture, just like pretending to like poetry. Your concubine... was just thinking about herself, thinking about stabilizing Husband, so that this family... would look like a family, so that others wouldn't point fingers. That was enough. Your concubine didn't think about Husband..."

"Women are so troublesome..."

"...But now I do."

The two voices sounded together. Ning Yi muttered boredly, while Su Tan'er spoke in a low voice, slightly choked up. After finishing speaking, they couldn't help but chuckle at the words. Ning Yi closed his eyes and stretched his palm over, his fingers almost touching Su Tan'er's cheek. Su Tan'er tilted her head, slightly closing her eyes, resting her cheek on his hand, feeling the touch of his fingers.

Both of them were always decisive people who disliked pretense. When they were together, there were certainly romantic conversations like the late-night talks in the small building, which were considered romantic in this era. But in reality, Su Tan'er was astute. The heart-to-heart talk in the small building was all done with a naturally attitude. There weren't many sweet words. Later, the Su family suffered a great disaster, and the relationship between the two progressed rapidly. Then there was Su Tan'er burning the building and consummating the marriage. Although there were occasionally a few sweet words, they were basically

between the sheets.

Su Tan'er's girlishness was rarely seen. They were both powerful people. Even if they were really flirting and teasing, it was all understood implicitly. But in the past two days, after learning about her pregnancy and knowing about Ning Yi's injuries, although she silently stayed by Ning Yi's side without saying much nonsense, it was only at this time that she truly opened her mouth to vent these things that she originally thought she didn't need to care about.

"Your concubine now knows that Husband takes those things to heart. Your concubine's thoughts are probably hidden from Husband. Thinking about it is truly embarrassing... At that time, your concubine thought of Husband as a silly scholar, reading a few dull books, not thinking about things, not knowing how to deal with people. I was thinking... as long as I could control Husband, that would be enough. How could a silly scholar like Husband be a match for your concubine..."

Ning Yi smiled: "He's not now either."

"Husband is magnanimous and may think that it's just the way things are. But your concubine now thinks, if these things could be done over again, that would be great. Your concubine would definitely treat Husband well. Your concubine... wants to learn to be a true daughter of a noble family, wanting to support her husband and raise her children. Your concubine doesn't want to marry Husband at eighteen, letting others say that Husband married a shrewish old maid. If I had married Husband when I was fourteen or fifteen years old, that would be great. In that case... in that case... everything would be different. Your concubine wouldn't have willfully dragged Husband to Hangzhou..."

Although Su Tan'er was a little choked up when she said the previous words, she was still calm. It was only when she said this last sentence that she finally truly cried. She clenched her fists on her sides, trembling slightly, crying fiercely. This woman was always proud, although it was all contained beneath a gentle exterior. But her worldview, developed from her time in the business world, was almost as sharp as Ning Yi's. Once things happened, she first sought only the way to solve them. Feelings of regret could at most be called summarization or reflection. But at this moment, knowing that the journey was difficult, and that her husband's injuries might be affected by the long journey, she actually felt guilty for such emotions.

Ning Yi sighed and moved closer to his wife. Su Tan'er grabbed his clothes, gritting her teeth and sobbing.

"We'll go back, there's still a chance," Ning Yi said.

Su Tan'er was already crying: "I want to have children for Husband now, I want to support my husband and raise my children, I don't want to be strong anymore, I don't want to do business anymore, I don't want to think about myself anymore... But now I also think, if now... if this child wasn't here, that would be great. If it's not here now, it can be here later. These past two days, I've seen Husband doing those things, desperately thinking about how to get out. I know Husband is burdened by responsibility. Even if there wasn't the responsibility of a child, Husband would still be like this, but I'm really scared... The doctor said that Husband's injuries need rest, need to be nursed, and then rely on his own body to get through it. Husband, you're working so hard for the sake of escaping, how can your body get through it... I want to advise you, but I know I can't advise you at all..."

She cried fiercely by Ning Yi's side, suppressed fiercely, so her body trembled fiercely as well: "These past two days, Husband has been asking those people about things, planning those things. I'm by Husband's side... I'm by Husband's side, holding back from speaking, there are always many people in my heart telling me that it's useless to speak, it's useless to speak, it'll just make you more upset, I can't let you be upset doing things and also be upset with me. But I also think, if only I were like those ordinary women, just crying and shouting, not allowing you to do these things, and then not having to worry about anything..."

Ning Yi patted her shoulder: "You also know it's useless to speak..."

"When I can't hold it in..." Su Tan'er sniffed, "When I can't hold it in, I go into the tent to hide, sit for a while, and hold back from crying. Chan'er and the others have cried several times. They wanted to come over and persuade you, but I stopped them all. I don't want you to have to waste your energy talking to them, or persuading them. I don't want to say useless words to you either. I don't want you to waste your strength speaking... I didn't want to say these things to you in the first place..."

After she finished saying these things, she cried softly, but compared to before, she was finally a little better. Ning Yi waited for a while, then said, "I'll get better."

Su Tan'er wiped her tears, but tears were still falling. She leaned on his chest and nodded: "You must get better. If you don't get better, I won't meet a husband like you again. I don't want the child, I don't want the family either... I wasn't a good mother in the first place. I've done things that caused other people's families to be destroyed... Husband, you remember, I have your child in my belly. You're very tired now, but you can't say you're tired, you still have to get through it. But it doesn't matter if you can't get through it, we'll go down and find you..."

She stared at Ning Yi with wide eyes, her delicate oval face, her cherry lips tightly pursed. As a woman, she had always been operating in the business world with a gentle style, because her appearance was exquisite, and she was only a girl in her early twenties, not like those decisive merchants. But at this moment, only the large eyes that had just cried revealed the stubbornness that had been cultivated in the business world for a long time, but had always been restrained. Mixed with that gentle face, it only conveyed a more heartwarming message to the person in front of her: This is your woman.

Ning Yi smiled: "Don't underestimate your husband. No matter what, I'll survive. You're destined to give birth to this child."

Su Tan'er touched her lower abdomen, then leaned closer to Ning Yi. She grabbed Ning Yi's collar with her other hand, closed her eyes, and seemed to be muttering something, as if praying for something,

but the mountain wind blew over, and the specific words could not be heard clearly.

The cottony clouds flowed in the sky, and the sunset glow burned across the sky, mountains, and streams. As night fell, the army began to operate busily in the camp of the fugitives. The next day, they broke camp again. The pursuing troops behind them were actually not that far away from them. When they approached at noon on this day, they began to receive a message from the isolated refugees: right in front of them, the largest fleeing group had begun to have internal strife... (To be continued.) Vote for recommendations and monthly tickets. Your support is my greatest motivation.)

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