Inside the room, Xiao Shan's eyes were red. He changed Ling Yao's clothes and carefully wiped her face and hands with a damp cloth.
"I knew it. Every time I scold you, you get like this, making me miserable."
"You're too cruel."
"You still dare to say you don't want me? Do you really think I wouldn't do anything to you?"
"You're bullying me! I'm working myself to death just to make your life better, and yet I've become an outsider..."
He harbored resentment, a great deal of it. He felt so useless, like a woman. Xiao Shan gripped Ling Yao's hand and buried his face in the bed, blocking his burning eyes.
"This is too much bullying..."
What a formidable man, yet he was crying.
He was hurt by her.
Ling Yao covered her face and started crying, "I'm sorry, I was wrong, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."
She had misunderstood. She thought he had discovered she had drugged him and had come to question her.
But now she understood. Drugging him was wrong, born of her insecurity and distrust.
In all this time, had he ever done anything to make her distrust him? He had given his all, wishing he could lay his heart bare for her. Why was she so petty?
She was sick.
But how could she be cured?
"Don't cry. Your qi and blood have just been regulated, be careful of the baby." Xiao Shan sat up on the bed and embraced her, soothing her.
Ling Yao turned and hugged him, crying with sobs.
"You can't cry, don't cry. I'm not blaming you. I just... you shouldn't have hidden it from me. I don't agree with taking your blood. This body of yours belongs to me, and you have no right to harm it."
Ling Yao scrambled up, knelt before him, and hugged his head, kissing him with an urgent and fierce passion.
Xiao Shan was pushed back by the force, his eyes wide open, until he leaned against the headboard. The bitterness of tears filled his mouth, along with the fragrance of her lips.
This was...
A slap followed by a sweet date?
Where had she learned this art of managing a husband? Wasn't this what he had wanted to do to her before?
He really wanted to press back with all his might, but her belly was pressing against him...
Ling Yao stopped. Tears welled in her eyes as she looked at Xiao Shan, her voice filled with grievance, "Why aren't you kissing me?"
"I... I'm afraid you can't handle it."
Her qi and blood had just been regulated! He didn't want to suffocate her. He was truly afraid of that big belly.
Ling Yao heard him. Seeing that she had already forced him to the headboard, she choked back a sob, retreated, and sat on the bed, falling silent.
"What's wrong?" Xiao Shan cleared his throat and leaned closer.
"Why did you come back? Weren't you negotiating with the Turks?" Her voice was thick with a nasal tone, soft and sweet, her delicate and slender body so pitiable.
"You're more important than that. Someone is accompanying me, and I'm not the only one in the court."
Xiao Shan pursed his lips and emphasized again, "Regarding the blood extraction, I don't agree."
"Why don't you ask what I drugged you with?"
"It won't kill me anyway," Xiao Shan replied dully.
"I drugged you with something that would make you impotent."
Xiao Shan: "..."
"Did I displease you, or are you afraid I'll do something beastly to you?"
"No, my belly is big, and I can't be intimate with you anymore. I know you wouldn't do such a thing, but I'm still afraid. I'm afraid you'll... outside..."
She choked back a sob. "I won't do it again. I shouldn't have treated you like this... I'm sorry."
She buried her face in the quilt, her shoulders beginning to shake again.
Xiao Shan lowered his head and looked at himself.
Just now, did he... not react?
"What's the big deal? You're still crying, stop crying! If you give it to me, I'll eat it, even if it's poison."
Xiao Shan remembered. No wonder he had felt so strange that day. Hadn't he drunk it himself? The little thing seemed hesitant at the end.
Sigh! After all that, it was just this kind of medicine.
It was quite good, saving him the trouble of cold showers every day.
"Why do I feel like I'm going to be impotent for the rest of my life? Back in the village, people also spread rumors that I was no good. This time, I'm really no good. Oh well, whether I'm good or not, as long as my wife knows what's going on, right?"
Ling Yao sat up, and indeed, she had turned into a red-eyed rabbit again.
"In the village, I was the one who spread the rumors. I said you were no good, and many doctors couldn't cure you," she said, hiccuping through her tears.
Xiao Shan was stunned. He patted her back and asked, "Why would you do that?"
"So that no woman would fancy you."
Who would fancy him? Was he that desirable?
"I won't do this again in the future. I think I might be sick, but I can't control it. Sometimes I dream of you with other women, and my heart aches so much I can't breathe. I wake up gasping for air. I know it's fake, but I am a goddess, and my premonitions are true. Now, I can't distinguish between what's real and what's fake. Am I sick? How should I treat it?"
"You're not sick, you just love me too much." Xiao Shan held her tightly, his entire heart feeling as if it had been steeped in a honey pot and kneaded. The sweetness was real, and the pain was also real.
Her words broke his heart.
He had heard that pregnant women tend to overthink things. So many things had happened recently; she must be exhausted.
"Remember from now on, the good dreams about me are true, and the bad ones are false. I like it when you care about me. If you're worried, just drug me, and I'll take it. I love you like this."
"Are you serious?" Ling Yao looked at him uncertainly.
"Never more serious. I really like your domineering ways. I am yours, and yours alone."
Xiao Shan didn't say it, afraid of scaring her. In fact, he was the same. Many times, he would feel insecure. When she was with other men, dark thoughts would sprout in his heart, even more so than hers. He needed her comfort to suppress that beast.
That's why he clung to her, enjoying seeing her lose control because of him.
Ling Yao finally stopped crying. Hearing Xiao Shan's words, her heart filled with sweetness.
When the taut string loosened, her spirit became somewhat weary, and she leaned softly into Xiao Shan's embrace.
"The drug's effect only lasts for three months. Qing He said it wouldn't harm the body."
That little slut. Forget it. He was thick-skinned; he'd just consider it appeasing his wife.
"When you came back just now, you were so scary. I was really frightened. I thought you were angry with me because of this."
"Don't talk about it! Who allowed you to harm yourself! If you dare to bleed again, I'll..." Xiao Shan's chest heaved with suppressed anger. "And you dared to hide it from me. Just now, the three of you ganged up on me. I truly felt like an outsider! Clearly, clearly you are mine, who are they to matter? You even told me to get lost..."
"I didn't!" Ling Yao felt wronged. "I just thought it wasn't necessary. You're so busy, such a small matter..."
"A small matter? Eight bowls of blood? How much blood is in your body? After eight bowls, would you still be alive?"
"What eight bowls? It was just a little bit to be used as a medicinal ingredient."
Xiao Shan: "???"
"How much is a little bit?"
Ling Yao gestured. "About enough to cover the bottom of a teacup."
Xiao Shan's lips pressed into a straight line. He looked at the quilt thrown on the floor, on which was a pool of blood.
He vomited for nothing?
This whole situation was a bit of a loss, wasn't it?
He recalled how he strategized on the battlefield, achieving victory from a thousand miles away, facing storms and waves without flinching, always stronger than the enemy, as calm as a gentle breeze over the hills.
Only when it came to her affairs did he lose all composure, scolding her without even understanding the situation.
Harming her a thousand times, and hurting himself eight hundred times.
Alas!
Where was reason to be found in matters of love?
He had long since admitted defeat.