Chapter 145: Just Having Fun [2]
’Hmm... strange.’ I flipped another page and took a sip of coffee, confused by the strange culture of this world.
The novel was about a boy that reincarnated into a Victorian-style world without any magic. It looked like a historical novel to me, but that was what they called fantasy in this world. The reason behind its popularity was the author’s creativity in making a world that was depending on steam power instead of mana.
Just like how in my past life there were novels about people with different professions taking advantage of their knowledge after reincarnation, like an engineer or doctor for reference, the protagonist of this novel used his magic when no one else could, blending it with the steam power to achieve what he desired.
This novel wasn’t only high-rated, it even got the title of Book of the Year engraved on the cover!
In other words, if I ever wrote a novel about my past life — a world that had nuclear weapons that could erase countries — I might become a famous fantasy author.
Or if I... ’borrowed’ one from my past life. Yeah, this might work too.
After an hour, we finished the first volume. As Exalted, our reading speed was faster than normal people, so we didn’t need a lot of time to finish it.
"How was it? Did you like the story?" Selene asked while closing the book and standing up.
I nodded. "Yes, I did. The coffee is good too. Glad that I decided to trust you."
Selene smiled brightly, carrying the books on the table and moving away. "I’ll go get the second volume for us, just give me a minute."
As she walked away, leaving me alone with Elara and Liora, I couldn’t help but notice the author’s name on the cover.
’Ivan Park?’ I read inwardly, remembering someone I knew with a similar name.
[It’s him! I heard someone saying his full name before.]
Hearing Glutton’s words, I became almost sure it was the same person. Glutton had a perfect memory, so he wouldn’t make any mistakes in this aspect.
The person in my mind was none other than Ivan, the apex of the second year’s combat ranking, and the same elf that I met when I was a child that also told me about Lunara’s wall trick.
I didn’t know that he had a habit of writing books. Well, we weren’t even that close to start with, but it was still surprising for a talented Exalted to have such a habit.
’Wait!’
All of a sudden, a theory formed in my mind: ’Is Ivan a reincarnator too? Is that how he knows too much about the Victorian-style?’
I might be just overthinking it, but come to think of it, the book was actually so detailed about the Victorian-style, which wasn’t supposed to exist in Eldoria as much as I knew. Was that just a coincidence or not?
And if he was really a reincarnator, what would I do? Would I just go and meet him while talking in English? I couldn’t even remember how to ask about time in English!
Did he even know English himself? I couldn’t ensure that the other reincarnators would be from the same country as me. He was also a year older than me which made it more complicated.
As I was lost in thoughts, Liora suddenly cut my thoughts off. "Raylin, if you don’t mind... Selene told us that you have barely slept for the past 2 days. Can we know the reason?"
Elara nodded rapidly. "I want to know too, tell us!"
I raised an eyebrow as I answered: "Just some nightmares — It’s not a big deal. Why are you even asking?"
Liora’s eyes glowed for a second before returning to normal. "She was just... too worried, so I thought it was something big. Sorry for this."
She suddenly hit Elara’s leg under the table — maybe thinking that I’d not notice — then Elara said: "Y-yeah. She also seems to be very happy when she is with you, you two must be very close to each other. I bet she loves you too much, second only to her father."
"Thank you." I replied blankly as I took another sip of coffee, but inwardly, I had different thoughts.
’Zephyr you son of a bitch!’
Did that bastard start some rumours? It was possible! Cel was living with him, and she was a friend with Elara and Liora, so it was very possible that he told her something about me and Selene.
Damn that! I was definitely going to make him regret it if he really started that!
For now, I could only ignore all the hints they were saying, I wasn’t easy to tease or get embarrassed anyway.
A few moments later, Selene returned, humming happily in her way, until she sat beside me and placed one new book in front of me and another one in front of Liora and Elara.
"Sorry for taking so long, I was asking them for more coffee."
I shook my head as I opened the first page. "It’s okay, I’m not in a hurry. Anyways, let’s start reading."
"Mhm!" Selene nodded while resting her cold head on my shoulder again.
Was that because of what happened yesterday? She seemed to like my shoulder today, but it wasn’t like I minded it.
I was resting my head on her shoulder yesterday, and she did the same today. We were already close enough to not care about—
’—No, this isn’t normal.’ I suddenly thought as I wondered about all her past actions.
Maybe there was some logic in Zephyr, Liora and Elara’s behaviours.
From another person’s perception, we really might seem like a couple.
We were too close, we slept together, we ate together, we went almost everywhere together, just recently she hugged me multiple times, and we even went together and alone into a pool with very light clothes she wore comfortably around me.
Even 2 friends of the same gender might not do all that comfortably. Thinking about all that, the first question came to my mind: ’Do I love Selene?’
Looking at her adorable, cute face and seeing her bright smile as she flipped a page, the answer was as clear as the sun to me.
Absolutely yes! I indeed loved her too much.
But the real question was, how did I love her exactly?
I loved Aria, Cel, Alfred, my mother, my grandmother and even that bastard Zephyr.
Thus the question was about how, not if. Was it normal love or romantic one?
I stopped focusing on the book and thought about a test that I heard about in my past life.
I imagined her kissing a man, and that man was Zephyr. The moment their lips touched, I indeed had the urge to skin Zephyr alive!
But then I imagined Aria as well, and just like before, I wanted nothing more than to see Zephyr screaming in agony.
I thought about all the girls I knew, and I always had the same result. But there was no way that I loved all girls romantically including Aria. Something was wrong in that test.
’Maybe this isn’t the right test for me, or maybe it’s Zephyr’s fault.’ I thought as I tried to think about something else.
’Will I know if I think about her body and physical contact?’ I wondered as I imagined about her body, but I didn’t feel anything within me.
But even if I felt, that would have been lust instead of love, right? And even thinking about physical contact, her head was right now pressing on my shoulder and all I felt was comfort.
Was that romantic love or not? Did that mean I loved her like a sister and was comfortable around her, or loved her so much romantically that I was comfortable with her without caring about her body and appearance?
As I was thinking about that, Selene suddenly took my hand and put it on her head, using it to pat herself.
Just then, I had another question in my mind: ’Does Selene herself love me like a brother or romantically?’
That was also a hard question.
Whenever I read a novel, I’d always see the heroine blushing or hesitating whenever she came close to the protagonist.
But Selene was the opposite, she was actually too bold, and I had seen her blushing for the first time in my life just recently, only when Zephyr thought that she was my girlfriend.
It was either she was just embarrassed... or she really loved me.
’Fuck! What am I supposed to do?! I don’t understand anything about emotions.’ I screamed inwardly before calling: ’Glutton, do you think that I love her?’
His answer came quickly: [How the fuck am I supposed to know? I’m not professional in that aspect. Maybe you can try asking Zephyr, he definitely knows the answer.]
I clicked my tongue inwardly: ’Tsk, useless bird.’
I had no choice but to think about 4 different scenarios.
The best 2 would be that we both either loved each other romantically or we both didn’t.
The problem was in the other 2.
What if I loved her and she didn’t?
And the worst one.
What if she loved me and I didn’t? Would I end up breaking her heart? I obviously didn’t want to do such a thing, but would I have a choice?
Before I could realize, Selene suddenly finished the last page and closed the book before looking at me. "Another cliffhanger, should I go to get the next volume?"
I snapped out of my daze and forced my lips to curl into a smile. "Yes, please."
"Give me a minute!"
Seeing Selene taking the books and running away, my gaze landed on the cold cups of coffee, we all forgot about them.
I lifted one up and brought it to my mouth, taking a sip, as I thought: ’I hate complex emotions.’
Ironically, hate was also a complex emotion.