The proud Prince of Orange, soon to be the first King of the Netherlands and the last hereditary Stadtholder, William V, and the eldest son of Princess Wilhelmina of Prussia, Frederick Sophia Wilhelmina, William Frederick, was actually being called a bumpkin?
William I thought, "I've seen it all, haven't I? I've seen your Thames River choked with shit, I've seen you mobilize tens of thousands of people to clear out cesspools. Is there anything in this world that can still scare me?"
What was that?
Quanzhou Port?
Cough, this was an accident, an accident. The main reason was that I had never seen such a tall yet so clean city, and I was a little unaccustomed to it for a moment, it was definitely not because I, William I, had too little experience!
However, upon arriving at Tianjin Port, William I, who had been holding himself together all the way, finally couldn't maintain his composure anymore: "This is not even the capital of Ming Country? This is a port similar to Quanzhou? Then can you tell me how many ports like Quanzhou there are in Ming Country! Also, how far are we from the capital of Ming Country?"
George III cast a sympathetic glance at William I, sighed, and said, "William, I can't say for sure how many ports like Quanzhou there are in Ming Country, but I know of old ports, Lanfang, Guangzhou, Quanzhou, Fuzhou, Songjiang, Ningbo, Jimo, Denglai, Tianjin, Lushun, Dandong, Korea, Kyushu, Ryukyu, and a whole lot more that I don't know of."
Seeing that George III's ten fingers were starting to run out, William I was completely despairing. He kicked the side of the ship hard and angrily exclaimed, "They're all Great Ming! We'll give all your English and our Dutch ports to Great Ming another day! I'm telling you, George, you'll regret it sooner or later, you definitely will!"
George III patted William I on the shoulder and comforted him, "Now do you know why I advised you not to conflict with Great Ming?"
"You must know that even if the entire of Europe unites, it will have no impact on Great Ming. They can produce their own grain, their own machinery, their own silk, porcelain, and tea. They can produce almost everything you can imagine, and they don't have to worry about sales because they have a large population that accounts for one-third of the world's population."
"Give up your unrealistic ideas, William. There are many more surprising things to come."
William I felt that there was nothing in the world that could surprise him anymore. Even after seeing the steam locomotive and riding on it, William I could force himself to remain calm.
But when William I, along with George III, rode the steam locomotive, bumping and rattling all the way to the capital, and stayed at the post house arranged by the Honglu Temple, William III couldn't help but break down.
"Alright, George, I think I understand completely."
William III said with utter despair, "I won't cause trouble for myself, nor will I cause trouble for you. I think I know what to do."
George III patted William I's shoulder sympathetically and said, "You'll get used to it slowly, William. Look here, this is the toilet in Ming Country."
William I said, both bewildered and desperate, "Alright, George, I know everything in Ming Country is good, but you don't have to specifically take me to see the toilets of Ming Country, do you?"
George III shook his head and said, "Pay attention to the toilets in Ming Country."
William I asked blankly, "Is there a problem with this? Don't you have flush toilets in England too?"
George III pointed to a mark at the bottom of the toilet bowl and said, "Look here – toilets produced in Ming Country will have Chinese characters printed on them, indicating the name of their manufacturer, while toilets exported from England to Ming Country must have the mark 'madeinengland' to distinguish them."
"The flush toilets produced by our England are popular in many countries in Europe, including France, but in Ming Country, real nobles or rich people only choose flush toilets produced by Ming Country itself."
"As for the toilets produced by England or other European countries, even if the quality is similar, they can only be priced lower, otherwise, no one will buy them."
"Let me put it this way, there are three types of flush toilets on the market in Ming Country. The first type is produced by local manufacturers in Great Ming, which is the most expensive. The second type is produced by England, which is slightly cheaper than those produced by local manufacturers in Ming Country, but higher than the third type, which are toilets produced by other European countries, including France."
William I really wanted to ask George III, what was the meaning of that proud expression on your face?
Were your English goods reduced to competing with France in terms of badness?
George III continued, "I'm telling you this to let you know that Ming Country is a terrifying country. Here, never put on airs of royalty, and don't get angry if the commoners here dare to look you in the eye, or feel that they are disrespecting you."
"In fact, they treat everyone like this, except for the Emperor of Ming Country, because any commoner here might have been a noble or even royalty in their ancestry."
Saying this, George III couldn't help but show a self-mocking smile, "Do you know that the last time I came to Ming Country, I let Macartney take me around – I met a farmer who told me that his ancestor was an emperor from five thousand years ago, and he even produced a paper genealogy as evidence."
William I remained bewildered.
In Europe, nobles who had their own family crests were already remarkable. Those who could sort out the affairs of their family in a short span of one or two hundred years were considered high nobles. If anyone had records on parchment, they had to be nobles among nobles. Looking at people with their noses in the air was a trivial matter; not walking with a swagger was considered unfashionable.
But who could have imagined that here in Ming Country, any farmer could produce such a genealogy, and also trace back thousands of years of history?
Seeing William I's look of disbelief, George III could only shrug his shoulders and say, "You know, William, I have no reason to lie to you, the fact is as it is. Later, I also asked the Emperor of Ming Country about this question, do you know how the Emperor of Ming Country replied?"
William I shook his head stupidly and asked blankly, "How did he reply?"
"The Emperor of Ming Country said that nobles like that are everywhere in Ming Country," George III said. "If you throw a brick on the street, you'll hit ten people, nine of whom are nobles like that farmer, and one might have an even nobler identity."
"Therefore, if you go out alone, be sure not to conflict with the commoners of Ming Country, even without considering their noble status. Even if you feel offended, please come back and explain the situation to me, and never try to be clever and challenge them to a duel."
William I continued to be bewildered, "Why? Why can't I even challenge them to a duel?"
George III said, "Do you think you can defeat them? Even if you can defeat the commoners of Ming Country, will you be glorious? Also, the government of Ming Country will favor their commoners indefinitely, and they don't care if you are the king or a noble of some country."
"There is a cruel punishment in Ming Country called 'Jingguan', where the corpses of enemies are piled up like mountains and sealed with earth. The uppermost layer is topped with the heads of the kings or generals of their enemy countries."
"There is such a structure in Jinan Prefecture of Ming Country, not far from Jimo Port which we passed; there is also one in Jiaozhi Province, not far from Da Nang Port which we passed."
"So, if you don't want your head to be chopped off by their army, you'd better not challenge them to a duel, so as not to get yourself into trouble."
William I immediately said in a low voice, "I understand."
As soon as he thought about piling up corpses into mountains and placing the heads of enemy kings or generals on the very top of the corpse mountain, William I felt a chill down his spine, and his neck always felt cool.
William I was completely fooled by George III.
George III continued, "Alright, I need to see the Emperor of Ming Country. As for you, you can wander around the capital of Ming Country with Macartney for now, how about that?"
William I's Adam's apple bobbed, and he said, "You go and attend to your business. It's better for me to stay here and wait for you to return."
George III smiled and said, "Don't worry, William, as long as you don't violate the laws of Ming Country, you can wander the streets with confidence – Macartney knows the laws of Ming Country well, and with his reminder, there will be no problem."
William I then nodded in agreement.
...
Zhu Jinsong arrived in the capital shortly after George III. Upon receiving George III's request for a meeting, Zhu Jinsong immediately agreed – the army of Great Ming had beaten the army of England, so there had to be an explanation for this, and it couldn't be delayed.
However, upon meeting George III, Zhu Jinsong was the first to attack: "Old George, what's going on with your East India? I was traveling outside when I was hurriedly called back."
Perhaps because he had been studying books from Great Ming recently, George III's mind immediately flashed with phrases like "seize the initiative," "strike first," and "turn the tables."
However, George III intended to deal with Zhu Jinsong using a word he had just learned.
"Burning the foundation from beneath the pot."
George III smiled and said, "I am truly sorry, this is all a misunderstanding caused by those damned Dutch. See, after the misunderstanding is resolved, we are still good friends."
"By the way, I'm not just here to attend the second meeting of the Little Broken Pot, but there's another very important matter."
Zhu Jinsong said, "What is it?"
George III grinned and said, "East India, are you interested?"
George III's question made Zhu Jinsong a bit bewildered: "What do you mean, what does it mean to be interested? You don't think I'm planning to attack East India, do you?"
George III shook his head and said, "Of course not, as I said just now, that was a misunderstanding caused by the Dutch – I mean, I want to sell East India, as long as the price is similar to Alaska."
Zhu Jinsong was even more bewildered: "No, Old George, why do you want to sell East India like this?"
George III said, "Because that wretched place is far from our England homeland, and those Dutch are really difficult to manage, it's really a 'chicken rib' (something useless but can't bear to discard). If your Great Ming is willing to take it over, it would be helping England a bit – with our relationship, how could you bear not to help?"
Zhu Jinsong said, "How could it be? As you said, with our relationship, we definitely must help with this matter."
"How about this, the price will still be eighty-eight thousand eight hundred and eighty-eight taels of silver, the same as Alaska, and in addition, I will personally give you one hundred cannons and five thousand flintlock guns, how about that?"