When Xing Zheng was sent to study at the University of Pennsylvania from Nanjiang University, he was only nineteen years old. He had not been home for nearly a year before that. On that day, Xing Zheng was taken to a restaurant by Xing Sha, and the father and son sat together. Xing Sha’s expression was serious, and he told Xing Zheng about the plan to send him abroad to study. "I've already made arrangements. You'll leave as soon as you pass your IELTS. I'll handle your university withdrawal procedures tomorrow."
It was not a discussion, but a notification, and he wasn't even given a reason. He didn't want to go and asked Xing Sha why he was doing this. Later, he found out that it was Xie Qin Jia who no longer wanted to see him, and she would send him abroad regardless of the cost.
Xing Zheng had always been a man of few words since childhood, and his communication with Xing Sha was also scarce. After Xing Sha finished telling Xing Zheng about this, Xing Zheng remained silent for a long time. Feeling guilty, he said to his father, "You can come back after you finish your studies. Your mother still can't accept the reality. Give her some time, it's better for both of you."
At that time, he hadn't said a word, but later he followed his father's decision. The next day, he went to school to withdraw, and not long after, he went to Philadelphia to study.
Xing Sha felt guilty and transferred a considerable amount of money to Xing Zheng every month. He also asked his friends there to look after him, but Xing Zheng never contacted them. Xing Sha and Xing Zheng didn't contact each other much, for fear that Xie Qin Jia would find out. The father and son only contacted each other occasionally via WeChat. When Xing Zheng decided to return to China to develop, he finally asked Xing Sha why he insisted on sending him away back then. Xing Sha only replied, "Since you've decided to come back, don't think about the past."
Don't think about it, how could he not? The seven years of experiences, enduring the freezing rain alone, watching reunions by himself, were already etched into his bones, indelible forever. For two consecutive Spring Festivals, he fell asleep under the combined effects of inhibitors and sedatives. Xing Zheng withdrew from his memories and asked Xing Sha, "Why?" His voice was even hoarser than before.
"She had a relapse at that time, bipolar disorder," Xing Sha told Xing Zheng. "She didn't want to see you, and the doctor also advised against letting you two meet. For the sake of treatment, you had to be sent away first. When you returned to China, she no longer needed long-term medication. She started having symptoms again a few days ago."
Bipolar disorder is a mental illness that is almost impossible to cure. Recovery is impossible; it can only be controlled. The symptoms will either slow down or worsen with the patient's emotional fluctuations. After a long illness, one becomes a doctor. Xing Zheng was already familiar with these medical definitions. When he was diagnosed in the United States, the professor told him that it was a genetic disease. Xing Zheng had denied it at the time, but he never expected that Xie Qin Jia actually had bipolar disorder. In the past, Xing Zheng had never thought of it in this way.
His gaze was deep and dark, fixed on the rosewood floor beneath his feet, his throat feeling as if something was stuck, and he couldn't utter a single word.
Xing Yan: "I thought she would have come to her senses after a few years of stability, but so many years have passed, and she still hasn't. You're back, and she's still like this."
Xing Yan regretted sending Xing Zheng away back then. He had indulged Xie Qin Jia for so many years, but in the end, he couldn't make her any better; instead, she became more willful, especially regarding Zhao Jiang He's affairs... Xing Yan's gaze sharpened. He said to Xing Zheng, "I'm sorry to you. I shouldn't have indulged her unreasonable behavior back then and sent you away, making you suffer so many years..."
Xing Zheng never expected Xing Sha to apologize to him. This apology came quite abruptly and was not like his usual demeanor. He always listened to Xie Qin Jia. If Xie Qin Jia told him to go east, he would never go west. For him, his wife was the number one person in his world; his son was nothing.
Xing Zheng didn't respond and, with a heart full of doubt, listened to Xing Sha continue. "Over the years, I've helped a lot with the Zhao Corporation's affairs. I've done all I can. This time, her relapse is because of the news about the Zhao Corporation. She wants me to invest and help Zhao Jiang He."
Xing Zheng: "You didn't help?"
He had indeed told Xing Sha not to get involved in the Zhao Corporation's matters before. Xing Sha hadn't given him a clear answer. He thought that if Xie Qin Jia insisted on helping, Xing Sha would eventually compromise. He thought that Xing Sha had long since regarded Zhao Jiang He as his own son, just like Xie Qin Jia.
"If I had helped, would she still have relapsed?" Xing Sha's tone was weary. "Over the years, I've agreed to too many unreasonable requests from her to make her feel better. I made a mistake from the beginning. I shouldn't have indulged her in everything. I've discussed it with the doctor, and from now on, I won't indulge her unconditionally as before."
It was rare for these words to come from Xing Sha. Xing Zheng said, "Oh. So I'm her biological son."
After learning that Xie Qin Jia had bipolar disorder, his first thought was this. When the doctor told him about the inheritance before, he thought he might be the child of Xing Sha and another woman. In that case, Xie Qin Jia would have a legitimate reason to dislike him.
Now that he knew about the inheritance, he felt even more ironic. Even the last bit of self-consolation couldn't stand.
Xing Sha looked at Xing Zheng incredulously. "How could you have such a thought?"
Xing Zheng: "She hates me so much, shouldn't I have it?"
"Some people have bad relationships with their parents, but no one has one like mine and hers," Xing Zheng recalled the past. "I've never seen a mother hate her son to the point of wishing him dead."
"She..." Xing Sha felt uncomfortable seeing Xing Zheng like this. He walked up to Xing Zheng and placed his hand on his shoulder. "She's a patient. Some things are said out of emotion, you don't need to mind. No matter what, it doesn't change the fact that you are mother and son."
"Ah Yan's death was too great a blow to her."
"If it were me who died, would she still be like this?" Xing Zheng asked, though he already knew the answer in his heart.
Xing Sha revealing Xie Qin Jia's condition was also to comfort him. Xie Qin Jia's dislike for him was not just because of that car accident. The car accident was just a fuse. He had felt Xie Qin Jia's aversion to him since childhood. When he was five or six years old, he had already thought that he might not be her biological son.
"What are you saying!" Xing Sha frowned. "It's all in the past, let's not think about it anymore. Even if you really left now, Ah Yan wouldn't come back."
"Yes, he wouldn't come back." Xing Zheng looked at Xing Sha. "Do you blame me?"
He wanted to call him "Dad," but he couldn't. He hadn't called him that in years, and it had become unfamiliar.
"Whether you believe it or not, Ah Zheng, I've never blamed you," Xing Sha said to Xing Zheng. "When your mother's condition improves, I'll hand over Rong Shi to you. From now on, you'll make all the company's decisions. Whether to help the Zhao family or not is up to you."
If Rong Shi had always been in his hands, Zhao Jiang He would probably still come to find Xie Qin Jia in the future.
Xing Zheng: "Hand it over to me?"
Xing Sha: "You are my son, and the company should have been yours anyway."
"He's not!!" The study door was suddenly smashed open, and Xie Qin Jia rushed in.